The Spoonie Mummy

A couple of week’s ago I asked on my Instagram stories for people who were willing to share their health stories on my blog. Harriet replied tot his request and I had the pleasure of interviewing this lovely lady for this post.

Post-natal depression is something that I, luckily, have not experienced. It is a type of depression that many parents experience after having a baby – as yes, father’s and partners can experience it too. It is believed to affect more than 1 in every 10 women within a year of giving birth.

Harriet’s Story

So, first tell me about you!

I’m Harriet, I am 36 and a mum of 2 from Chester. I have a degree in Psychology and am currently studying for my MA in Children and Young People’s Mental Health. My daughter Sophie is 12.5 and son, James, is 2. We have 2 bunnies called Thor and Loki. I am a big film fan and a huge history/dinosaur geek so my favourite film ever is obviously Jurassic Park! I am the eldest of 5 and have 2 sister’s and 2 brothers. We all still live within 5 miles of each other.

When did your journey with PND start?

When James was 4 weeks old.

So your first pregnancy/birth and post-natal period was ‘normal’?

Oh no, absolutely not!

Well, the pregnancy was fine – the usual morning sickness and water retention issues, but otherwise normal.

Sophie was then 10 days late so I had to be induced. I was in labour for 27 hours and then my epidural ran out so I had to have an emergency C-section under a general anesthetic. After the birth I had a hemorrhage and lost 2 litres of blood. I was in hospital for 5 days and had to have 2 blood transfusions. Because I was highly medicated, I wasn’t aware of how serious it was, until I attended the Birth Options clinic when I was pregnant with James and they read my surgeon’s notes in detail to me.

Looking back, the signs of PND were there after I had Sophie, but I was a single mum and just had to get on with it.

So how did you feel, finding out all that information as you were getting ready to give birth again?

It was eye-opening as I knew I’d had the blood loss but I didn’t know how much and how serious it was, and how close I cam to not recovering. That was the scariest feeling ever. They also told me that Sophie had to be pulled out by her arm as she was so stuck. I just feel so lucky she wasn’t hurt during the process.

After all that I elected to have a planned C-section with James, as I didn’t want the possibility of needing to be induced again. Finding all this out definitely impacted my mental health at this point, making what was a complicated pregnancy, even more scary. I became more on edge the further along I got,

So you made a plan for his delivery following the birth de-brief – how did that go?

So I elected for a planned C-section. I just really didn’t want to give birth if I could help it – but James ad other ideas.

From 26 week he placed himself behind my placenta. Feeling him move was near impossible and I was in and out of the day unit getting checked. At 36 week they started talking about me having him early due to reduced movements. I had steroid injections but then, due to a rather annoying surgeon, it didn’t end up happening.

I ended up having an emergency C-section a week before min e was due because the senior midwife at the hospital said I’d been going through this hell for too long – she was amazing.

What happened when you all got home?

We came home the next day and James was really well. He was a little dot at 7lbs 8oz, compared to Sophie at 10lbs 1oz! I had to heal from the surgery and was on a 6 week course of Tinsziparin, which for someone with a needle phobia wasn’t great!

I remember early on not wanting to be left on my own with James. I wasn’t afraid of hurting him or anything – luckily my PND never went that route. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to do something as I was in so much pain.

What did you do about the feelings you were having? Did you get a diagnosis?

Yes, so at 4 weeks when my now ex-husband went back to work, I just realized how low I was feeling and broke down in tears. I called my health visitor who was a dream, she put me on the phone with the mental health crisis team and actually came out to see me that day.

Within the week I was speaking with the GP and because I was a new mum, my referral to the mental health team got seen a lot quicker.

That’s great, sometimes it isn’t the case but I am so glad they were on the ball. What kind of treatment plan did they provide?

Medically, I was place on Sertraline to help with my mood and the hormones.

I was originally put on a 6 week programme, more of an assessment really, to see what help I needed. I scored really highly in the anxiety, depression and PTSD sections, so this led to me undergoing CBT counselling with the best counsellor ever – she her name is Kelly and she is amazing. I still undergo counselling but just once a month now, as opposed to twice a week which it was when I was at my worst.

Is there any advice you would give mums-to-be or new m um s based on your experiences?

My advice would be that you know your own body and your own mind. If you feel that someth8ing isn’t right, speak out. You are not alone, but don’t compare your pregnancy/birth/post-birth experience with others.

How are you doing now?

I’m getting there. I take each day as it comes. The kids are great and each have their own uniqueness which I love.

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A huge thank you to Harriet for sharing her story with me for this post. I hope that if you are reading this and feel like you are struggling, you will see how speaking to someone about it really does help.

You can follow Harriet on Instagram where she shares about mum life, mental health and organsiation.

Resources

Information about the symptoms and treatment for PND on the NHS website

PANDAS raise awareness of and support people with PND – check out their website. Their FREE helpline is available every day between 11am and 10pm – 0808 1961 776.

Mind, the mental health charity, has a range of great resources and offers support to those experiencing a range of mental health issues, including perinatal mental health conditions. Check out their website.

If you are interested in sharing your story, please email me – thespooniemummy@hotmail.com.